In-Con Sequential Art
Friday
Feb122010

Who Wants to be a Comic Villain?

In the Little City, sweet and peaceful
Citizens are living heedless of evil
Heroes stand sentinel for their protection
Guarding them from every single malediction
But out of a dark and mysterious past
Comes a black-hearted nemesis to kick some ass
I’m on like a thunderstorm, malevolently
But my vile profile lacks unique identity

Do I want minions or robots to obey my will?
Am I rackin’ up ducats, or rackin’ up kills?
Evil genius, bounty hunter, I'm the Black Hole Son
Packin’ knives, razor claws, and a twenty pound gun

Rivers of blood, rivers of blood will be spilling
Turnin’ up the evil, got a villainous twitch
Set my sights on the city, gonna make it my bitch
Who wants to be, be a comic book villain?
Two towering tyrants, we're a terrible team
Licensed by the state to make the innocent scream
Thieves, rogues, bastards and rapscallions
Mentored by Skeletor, Mumm-Ra, and Ganon
Think like Atilla, hit like a cannon
Pestilence, war, famine and death in the millions

Once one, now two, we've split in twain
I’ll take the brawn -- I’ll take the brains
Making me a monster of mountainous muscle
Granting me the gift of intellectual hustle
We flow, C0splay, it’s time to go
No one can stand against the Death Star Bros

I'm gonna be on the five o’clock news,
Use my huge mind to refine a plan for publicity,
Right there is me, atop a robot and I’m cack-a-ling
a-Dominate the city is my objective
And it seems possible from my perspective
My plan is strong and nothing’s gone wrong
Wreaking havoc is easier than spitting this song
Rampagin’ on my radical robot
I’m rockin’ like a Go-Bot
Stop, drop, cause it’s red hot
Mechanical might, technologically tight
Like a Giga-Knight, carrying this compusonic despot
Boastful?  Mostly, hopeful? Don’t be silly, just not necessary
Cause the maniacal plan by this maniacal man
has thus far manifested masterfully

Rivers of blood, rivers of blood will be spilling
Turnin’ up the evil, got a villainous twitch
Set my sights on the city, gonna make it my bitch
Who wants to be, be a comic book villain?
Two towering tyrants, we're a terrible team
Licensed by the state to make the innocent scream
Thieves, rogues, bastards and rapscallions
Mentored by Skeletor, Mumm-Ra, and Ganon
Think like Atilla, hit like a cannon
Pestilence, war, famine and death in the millions

Bustin’ up construction like a son-of-a-gun
Whence forth come the Little City’s champions
First up on the stage is the head of the band
So I knock him into Thursday with a red right hand
Little Miss Sidekick is talkin’ some smack
So I thrown down a compusonic siren attack
“Step back – he’s more powerful than we suspected!”
It’s not the boss battle these heroes expected
One slap with my pimp hand and they're running away!
I take advantage of the chaos and I enter the fray

What What

Atop the back of my V-unit
Makin’ all kinds of bystanders upset
Up front step a team of super suckas
More like a crowd of doomed mother fuckas

Here comes the Quick-Wit – you know we knock him down
Then Doctor Misfit  – you know we knock him down
Enter the Dragon – you know we knock him down
Zombie Reagan  – you know we knock him down

So much for the Super Six
Sent them floating face down on the River Styx
They looked so cute in their unitards
Too bad they collapsed like a house of cards
Fight finale, make a fist of the furious five
The Death Star Duo, wanted dead or alive
Now the city is ours, Revenge of the Sith Lords
But there’s one major point of discord
My intellect calculated our ascension
You couldn't beat them alone, shit you best repent son
The heroes would have won had I not thrown them a beating
You would have gotten nowhere if I hadn’t been leading
Might makes right or mind over matter
Tears for the former; Fears for the latter,
We see that we’re both left with this contention
His muscle versus my scientific invention
There’s no clear answer, so for now it’s peace
We remain a villain duo, this time, at least